“I’m tired; tired of the same rut. This can’t be all there is to life. I stink at living my own life. Just do it for me. Please, God?”
That was me (Scott) in 2006, three years after saying yes to Jesus. I was working a corporate job at a wireless internet provider. I’d always had this nagging feeling that I wasn’t doing what I was meant to do. I was completely dissatisfied in almost every part of my life, so I prayed to God. I had no idea what He had in store for me.
Compelled to serve and get more involved in church, I signed up to volunteer for Hurricane Katrina clean up in New Orleans in March 2007. It was the most amazing and fulfilling experience of my life, up to that point, because of the camaraderie and opportunity to serve others.
A month later, God brought Angie into my life. After our second date, she told me about the need at the Campus Crusade world headquarters for people skilled in computers. During trips to visit Angie in June and November, I met with staff members in Human Resources and also members of the IT (Information Technology) department.
After those meetings I knew God was leading me to serve with Campus Crusade on the computer team. (Kind of funny since I’d always thought missionaries served in the jungle or the inner city.) So, I applied to join as a missionary, was accepted, and Angie and I jumped in—along with 150 others—for the 5-week New Staff Training.
However, during the last week of training I became confused. I knew God had called me to become a missionary, but I wasn’t feeling the excitement like everybody else. I heard stories of those on the “front lines” of the ministry —on college campuses, inner cities or traveling around the world—and their amazing experiences. To be honest, I felt a little jealous.
The last week of our training, I asked God if I was truly following His will. In my heart, it felt like He said, “It’s okay, Scott. I don’t want you to be where they are. I want you in Orlando doing the very thing you know how to do.”
In an instant, my worry evaporated. And I felt honored that He would ask me to serve Him with Campus Crusade by just being me.
