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Women sprawled out all over the floor because we ran out of chairs. Forty-nine women indicated that they wanted to place their trust in Christ as a result of the Christmas Gathering outreach Sondra (right) and I hosted. (Cue angels.) Sondra baked an amazing spread of cookies and I talked about gifts (the giver, the recipient and the gift itself) and transitioned to Jesus being the best gift ever given.

Oh, wait. The cookies and the talk, that happened. But the 49 women? No. That was a dream. The reality was that 4 women came. And no lives were changed as far as I could see. Only four, Lord? I mean, really? We were so excited to see what You’d do in our neighborhood. Surely women are seeking this time of year? And we did everything “right” — Sondra hand delivered 40 invitations and talked with many of her neighbors.

What do we do with seeming failures and disappointments like this? My heart tends to sink and say, “I’ll take my ball and go home now. I don’t want to play anymore.”

And yet, was this a failure? When I stop and tell my feelings to hush for a minute, I realize it’s not. I know God is the God who leaves the 99 to go after the one. And there were 4 “ones” around our table. (See below.)

Since when have I become a superhero, equipped with x-ray vision to see hearts? I have no idea the extent of what God did on that cold Sunday afternoon in December. But I know one thing He did in mine: My self gets in the way too often. Truth be told, I want to see lives changed. I want to invest in things of great return. I…I…I. See the problem? I do. So God’s been challenging me to take on His strength and take my Angie self out of the way. To fix my eyes on Him and His purpose and timing.

Early on in my involvement with Campus Crusade I learned a definition of evangelism I think I’ve forgotten at many key moments (like the moment we closed the door after the last guest left): evangelism is sharing the gospel in the power of the Holy Spirit and leaving the results to God. (When in the Christian life has the focus ever been about me?)

Do you wonder if missionaries struggle, too? (Read a bookmark that really got my attention about pride vs. humility.)

Now a month later, I am so glad we stepped out in our neighborhood even if it didn’t turn out like we’d planned. We 6 had a great time laughing together and discussing opening the real meaning for Christmas. One new friend indicated she would like to be in a Bible study that Sondra’s starting. Who knows the rest of the story?

around-the-table

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